Open Adoption, Open Heart
The world of adoption has changed dramatically over the past twenty years. No longer do biological parents have to say goodbye to their child forever. They now have more options when deciding the type of adoption to pursue, such as open adoption. Open adoption creates the opportunity for a special relationship between biological parents, the adoptive parents, and the child.
Open Adoption, Open Heart is an inspiring and true story, which takes the reader deeper into the feelings and emotions experienced by adoptive parents. As you read this incredible story, you will experience the joys, difficulties, and amazing victories facing adoptive couples. Russell and his wife, Jammie, invite you to share in their inspiring and heartwarming journey.
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From the Author: While my book's primary audience was thought to be those hoping to adopt, close to half of the books I've sold are simply people who want to read about our story and how adoption is different now than it used to be- and they have not adopted nor do they plan to adopt.
That’s the great thing about fiction. I mean, when I read a good fiction novel and I finally close that back cover, it takes a few seconds to remember I’m not actually a cowboy or a spaceman, or whatever the book was about (I guess in this day in age it would probably be that I wasn’t actually in love with a vampire and a wolf at the same time). That’s the way to get to know adoption- to live through it with someone else taking you along for the ride. You can’t just hear about what adoption is like. You have live it.
Have I exaggerated my point too much yet? Oh well.
Our story started out with infertility. My wife and I tried and tried to get pregnant, but to no avail. We took a lot of our friends’ silly advice and tried home remedies that made no scientific sense. We obeyed our doctors. We saw specialists- all that good stuff. Still, no baby.
Deciding to adopt wasn’t very hard for us. It was all the stuff that happened afterward that made it crazy. Nowadays you have to create an online profile and wait for an expecting mother to pick you. We were lucky and got that magical email without having to wait too long- lucky since we were one out of about 950 couples with our agency. The young expecting mother really wanted to choose us and she really wanted adoption, but things kept getting more complicated and more complicated with the legal issues. Basically, the biological father said he didn’t want to raise the baby, but he didn’t want to sign any adoption papers either. He was just 16 years old and the birth mother was just 15. He wanted to be able to play daddy when he felt like stopping by, but not play daddy when it meant he had to do anything responsible. Since the birth mother was the only kid still living in her home with her single-parent mother who worked more hours than any regular full time job, she was basically being forced to keep the baby and drop out of school to live on welfare and be a mom.
She didn’t want that for herself nor for the baby. Finally, she told the biological father that she was leaving the state and she was going to go have the baby here in Idaho where we live (adoption laws are different in every state). That meant that the biological father had 2 choices- to raise the baby himself or to let her go through with the adoption.
Open Adoption, Open Heart is our story, not a “how to” or anything boring like that. The part of the story I just stold is all in the first half- it gets even more intense from there. It’s not just a wild ride, but it’s a soft and beautiful landing. It’s the story of how our family was built through the miracle of adoption. We’ve built such a strong and beautiful relationship through the trials we faced together. Even now, 2 ½ years after the adoption took place, we still talk a few times every week. She flies out to see us once in a while.
Our children will be able to know their biological parents and their amazing history. Our children will be able to have their own relationship with their biological parents so they can see for themselves that their past is a history of love, not neglect or abandonment. Hooray for adoption, and hooray for the trials that made us all better people.
Russell Elkins was born on Andrews Air Force Base near Washington, D.C., in the fall of 1977. Along with his five siblings, he and his military family moved around a lot, living in eight different houses by the time he left for college at age 17. Although his family movedaway from Fallon, Nevada, just a few months after he moved out, he still considers that little oasis in the desert to be his childhood hometown. He and his family now live in the Boise, Idaho area.
Russell has always been a family man at heart, looking forward to the day when he could be a husband and a father. It took him a little while, but eventually his eyes locked onto a beautiful blonde, and he has never looked away. Russell and Jammie were married in 2004. Years of struggling with infertility left Russell and Jammie with a decision to make and their lives changed dramatically when they decided to adopt.
Russell and Jammie have adopted two beautiful children, Ira and Hazel, and have embraced their role as parents through open adoption. Both are actively engaged in the adoption community by communicating through social media, taking part in discussion panels, and writing songs about adoption. Russell also writes a weekly post for Adoption.com and contributes regularly to Adoption Voices Magazine.
$25 Amazon Gift Card or Paypal Cash from Author Russell Elkins
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